Keeping busy is a wonderful thing . . . right? Laziness is a curse? A stick with which to beat ourselves? The single word that nibbles away at our self worth? A plague to our self confidence . . right?
So what do I do to combat this? I fill my life with projects. Entered into with gusto and full on commitment. These are taken on in addition to my job. The thing that actually puts baked beans on the table. Actually the thing that buys the table as well. I stack these projects up filling as many moments as I can, safe in the knowledge that being busy will make me a happier bunny . . . right? Laziness at arms length is a good thing . . . right?
Unbelievably I have some doubts. It almost scares me to say this out loud. Having doubts puts cracks into a belief system that has been the cornerstone of my life for many years. But I am not sure about all of these projects. I am not sure that I value the worth of these projects to my wellbeing. I judge the value of these projects more to combating laziness. I end up with intense frustration; that I do not have the time to put the best of myself into these projects. I rarely finish anything and I then fill that space with something else; blinded by my fear of laziness, scared stupid of any sizeable gap that might appear in my life.
But I am now seeing laziness as a good thing. A time when I can understand what it is that makes me happy. I am starting to think that 'less' is definitely 'more'. Fewer projects, some that I might even finish(!), might actually be a more productive and wholesome way to spend my time. Plus is laziness not just another way of enjoying time that I have worked flipping hard to enjoy . . . right?